Thursday, October 16, 2008

President for Sale

Someone e-mailed this link to calculate what you'd save on Obama's tax plan:

In addition to those cost savings, you get my 2 cents:

Now, I know we Americans like to buy some cheap shit. We're Costco lovin', coupon clippin', CVS discount card havin' patriots of the old red, white and blue... but do we really need to take our discount savings cards into the voting booth?

I'm curious, so I calculated now much I save on the candidates plans, and on Obama's plan I save the most, around $3 a day. $3 a day? Americans are going to vote on a leader than can change history and the price tag is only $3 a day?

Honestly, I'd rather lose $3 a day or $5 a day or $10 a day and know that I live in a country where bozo's aren't running the government, people's retirements aren't getting flushed down the toilets, and billions of dollars aren't being sent abroad to kill people. We shouldn't cheap out when it comes to voting!

We never learn from the consequences of saving a political buck? We exported all of our jobs, so we can have cheap toxic toys and cheap electronics. Now, India and China have a thriving economy and we're borrowing money from communists.

So, at the end of your $3 day, make sure your cheap ass votes on issues that matter.


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New York Gnats

It's October 16th in New York and 75 degrees. A temperature that might fall under the 'unseasonably warm' or 'Indian Summer' category. But I went for a run and realized that it falls under the 'apocalypic hot' category.

I went for a run and not only did I hear cicadas... but I ran through a patch of gnats. GNATS! In New York! If I weren't a born and bread Georgia girl, I probably wouldn't even know what gnats were. Then a guy stopped me and another woman on the street, and I thought he was trying to hand me a flyer, but instead he said, "Excuse me, excuse me, did you just walk through some gnats, too?" He was completely floored.

Gnats and cicadas, don't these insects know that it's Fall? Damn you, Al Gore, why couldn't we have heard you sooner!

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Maverick in the Making...

As unsettling as it is, the above photos are of me. I'm now a faux-maverick.

I signed on with an agency to be a Palin impersonator, which I personally find hysterical.

If Obama loses the election, I can offset the gut-wrenching disappointment and find comfort in the fact that I'll have work next year - I might be the only person with work in the US, but I'll be working.

This creates an emotional dilemma, if McCain wins, good for me... bad for the rest of the world. It's kind of like when I had to choose between a chemical laden, animal tested moisturizing creme that made my face smooth as a baby's butt, and an organic lotion that won't give me cancer.

... But I'm the spittin' image of a woman 10 years older than me, so I guess you know which one I chose.

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Saturday, October 04, 2008

Joey Biden

Here's what I love about Joe Biden, he’s not afraid to sport the political mullet.... you know, senator in the front, party in the back. It's subtle, but it's there, the front is letting you know, "I’m authoritative and knowledgeable," the back says "I drive a Trans Am."

You go Joe! Rock the PoliMullet.

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Friday, October 03, 2008

Getting Shoushed...

This morning I woke at 7 am to the sounds of an electric saw. It went on and on and wouldn't stop. So, half-awake, I opened the window, couldn't see where the noise was coming from, but attempted to yell, "Shut up with the sawing." But I forgot that I had my bite guard in, so what I actually yelled out the window at the top of my lungs to the neighborhood was "Shoush up wit da shawing."

And he stopped. I'm sure he just paused to ponder "what the hell did she just say?" Then he went back to sawing.

I closed my window and my husband says, "You just yelled something completely unintelligible to the world."

Then another neighbored authoritatively yelled, "Hey buddy, easy with the noise, it's early..."The sawing stopped and I'm sure the yelling neighbor caught himself before finishing his sentence with "that's so loud that you woke up the neighborhood deaf girl!"

Then about an hour later, my landlord came by to fix my bathroom, and I asked if the new neighbors were building something because there was a lot of noise this morning and he says, "No, that was me."

So, as it turns out, I shoushed my landlord.