I'd rather call India

Everyone complains about calling 800 numbers and no one speaks English. I actually prefer it to when you get someone who does speak English and is mildly annoyed that you called.

Instead of some eager worker on the other side of the world hoping to impress you with his English, you get some schmo in a warehouse in Baltimore who is annoyed that he has to stop sexting his girlfriend to take your call.

You can tell by the passive aggressive way they say things like, "You know you can find this on our website." With the undertone of 'gross, this moron is probably calling from a landline.'

Or the line they deliver with utter disdain, "Do you have access to the Internet?"

I like to skeeve them out and say, "No, can you explain what the Internet is?"