Life's a Trip

My dream was to be a travel writer. I settled on being a travel junkie. I actually leave tomorrow for Mexico with a friend because I was probably the only person she could call and say, “Do you want to go to Mexico this weekend?” knowing that I would be finished packing before the end of the conversation.

Although, truth be told, if I were constantly traveling for work, I'd be bitter. Complaining about the five star hotels and how my massage could have been a little firmer.

But if I were a humor travel writer, that would be write up my alley. (Write..ha, ha, I crack myself up.) So my writing would be chock full of silly puns, but more importantly, useless travel information. My first crack at travel comedy writing is below.

Travel Tips by Bev
Journey Shaman and Travel Planner Extraordinaire
(I forgot to mention that I'd have a bogus title too)

-> Be weary of hotels offering free underwear with a night's stay. Often this is a scam.

-> If you are checking in to a hotel that is currently on fire, know your rights and ask for a refund. If the manager is still alive, have him double-check that you weren't pre-charged on your credit card. If you have already checked into the hotel prior to it catching on fire, you might still be able to receive a partial refund.

-> When going through airport security, be cautious of security officials who need to make copies of your credit cards. This can sometimes lead to fraud.

-> When traveling abroad, know your rights! Ask for airport security to wear latex gloves while doing your cavity search.

-> Before or during a flight, refrain from referring to the airline staff with profanity such as f***heads or ass-munches. Often this may get you arrested. Instead save these comments for when you are exiting the plane at your final destination, then put the bitches in their place.

These simple tips can put more joy in your journey.

Happy Travels!
Bev