New York, NY

New York is the only city in the world where people can flat out lie about basic apartment facts before you go look at them. You call and set up an appointment to look at a two bedroom, you show up and only see one bedroom.

The broker tells you that you can put up a WALL and it’s a two bedroom! Hell, why stop there, I could put up thirty walls and make the 200 square feet my own mansion. Do I look like the kind of person that knows how to put up a wall? If I had the supplies and knew how to build, I’d build my own damn place!

I keep waiting to go see a three bedroom and I show up and it’s a parking lot. The broker would say, “all you’ve got to do is put up a roof and a few walls and you’ve got a three bedroom.”

And I’ve noticed in NY that whenever a scaffolding goes up or comes down, it completely changes the neighborhood. You could live in a building for 6 years, and one day some scaffolding comes down and you are completely lost. You could be walking with a friend and be right in front of your building and say “well, that’s weird, I thought my apt was here, huh... maybe it’s another block.”